What others see….

A friend of mine posted a quote the other day that got me thinking……”Your body is a reflection of your lifestyle.” 🤔

If someone I didn’t know was asked what kind of lifestyle I had based off how I looked, what would they guess? Would they guess a tired mom of a 4 month old and 2 year old? Or would they guess a hard partier because I look so tired? Lol

I’m not much of a makeup wearer, unless I’m going to an event or dinner. I’ve always hated the feel of makeup on my face so I rarely wear it. Most days I wear just mascara and lip gloss or chapstick. I only wear mascara because I feel like it opens up my eyes a little and makes me look less tired. Otherwise I wouldn’t normally waste the time putting it on.

Clothing wise, I live in leggings. It’s the most comfortable attire when chasing around a 2 year old. I see these Instagram moms in skinny pants or beautiful flowy dresses hanging out with their kids and I think to myself…..nope. I can’t even wear jeans and be comfortable during the day. I do too much up and down movements, squatting, crawling on my hands and knees, etc. I’m constantly cleaning up or picking up something. Leggings are literally the only clothing item that allows me freedom to move and feel comfortable.

I hope to most I have a “mom look” and not too much of a lazy look going on. I guess I could try a little harder in the mornings to look nice, but does it really matter? Right now my kids don’t care if I dress up for them and they’re pretty much the only people that see me regularly during the day.

I am always curious what someone passing me thinks when they see me. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Maybe it’s best I don’t know….😂

Toddler in the house

There’s nothing scarier than waking up at 4am, and hearing someone in your house going through your things……Only to find out it was your toddler who woke up and decided to have his own private play time. 🤦🏼‍♀️

Seriously though. I’ve never been more scared in my life. My husband was out of town and I was home alone with the kids. My oldest son was sleeping in bed with me because he’s still uneasy about the new baby and feeling like he’s going to get “left.” I thought I’d shut the bedroom door tight in case he did get up and wander. Clearly I didn’t. 🚪

There was a banging coming from the living room. I thought I was hearing things at first so I sat for a minute to really listen. It continued and a sort of crash followed. That’s when I knew someone was out there. Now thinking about it, if I’d been more awake I would have realized the dogs weren’t barking or going crazy. They do that if someone is just walking by the house. AND my child wasn’t in bed next to me anymore. However none of that was going through my mind at the time. The only thing I could think of was what do I do if someone is in the house? I knew I had to get to him before he got to my kids. There’s a bat under the bed so I went and grabbed that. I figured of anything I’d use my old softball skills to clobber him with the bat. 🥎

As I walked into the living room, I noticed toys everywhere. Then I saw the shadow of the intruder looked very small. That’s when it registered. It’s Ryder! The kid was up playing with his toys in the dark! I have no idea how long he was up. I’m typically a pretty light sleeper. But somehow he managed to wiggle out of my arms, get off the bed and go out into the living room all without waking me. 🛏

Just when I thought the toddler stage couldn’t get any more exhausting, mine goes and tries to give me a heart attack! ❤️

Life with two young kids

Life with two young kids….. 👶🏻 👶🏻

Yesterday the day started with one kid peeing ON my pillow. I’m still debating on whether to put it in the wash and bleach it or call it a loss and just throw it away. 🛌

It was then followed by Ryder taking off his shorts and diaper and running naked through the house. He was kind enough to take me by the hand and show me where he peed on the floor during his streaking episode. 🚽

Ryder’s new thing is sticking his hands down his pants…..we knew the day would come as it does with every little boy. However, we have started with the back side of our pants. It took all my energy not to fall over laughing when ryder stuck his hands down into his diaper, only to remember he had just pooped. He pulled his hands out and they were covered with poop. It was HILARIOUS to see the look on his face. Then I realized I had to clean him up. It stopped being funny…… 🧼

That afternoon Ryder decided he wanted to have a party while I was changing Camden’s diaper. He went into the pantry and took out the paper plates and flung them all over the kitchen. He then took out the remaining plastic wine glasses from a previous party and lined them up on the floor. He filled those glasses with animal crackers from his snack bowl. The dog decided to join the party and ate some of the animal crackers. He also took out any boxed food item and stacked them as high as he could. 🐶

During another of Camden’s diaper changes, Ryder thought it would be funny to go in the closet, shut the door and sit quietly giving mommy a heart attack as she ran around the house panicked trying to find him. 🚪

Dinner consisted of 75% of the meal ending up in Ryder’s lap or on the floor. (We are still trying to master our silverware skills.) So of course right before bed he was starving and asking for more food. Guess what I gave him……the remaining animal crackers in the plastic cups! 😂

Would I say this was a bad day? No. It was definitely a battle of a day but not our worst! We are all in one piece still. So I’d say it was just one of our more “busy” days. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Terrible Two’s

The “terrible two’s” have begun. I always wondered why people called it that. I’m learning…..just FYI, kids in their “terrible two’s aren’t bad kids. They haven’t turned bad, weren’t previously bad, etc. They are just at a struggling point. 😩

Around the age of 2 kids are learning how to communicate. They’re stuck in a world where they are learning words, and only know a few at a time. They want to communicate but they don’t know exactly how to get their emotions across with words. Not to mention dealing with their own emotions can be overwhelming enough as it is. It can be incredibly frustrating for a little one so temper tantrums and melt downs are extremely common. 😞

The easiest way to get through the “terrible twos” is to be patient and work with your child. Help them with words, and try to be understanding. Know that the temper tantrums aren’t done to punish or embarrass you. They are just extremely overwhelmed and that’s how they handle it. 👍🏻

It’s extremely frustrating at times but you sort of have to put yourself in your kids shoes. Imagine how frustrating how it can be for them. 💙

Mistakes

I realize now that I made quite a few “mistakes” with Ryder. Mistake might not be the best word to use since everything really was a learning experience. I’m just realizing now, I maybe should have done some things a different way than I originally did. Although, how are you to really learn/know without a little trial and error? 🤷🏼‍♀️

You can follow all the baby books and advice you want. But not everything “recommended” will work for your child. Sometimes you just have to throw out the books, ignore what everyone says (except your doctor) and just try your own thing! Your first child is like the experiment child. You figure it out as you go! 👶🏻

I get less anxiety when Camden cries. When Ryder would cry I would immediately panic to try to figure out what he wanted/needed. I actually caused myself unnecessary stress. With Cam I just listen. He has certain cries to give me cues if he’s hungry, tired, etc. Sometimes he just cries for a minute as if he’s confused as to what he wants. I let him do his thing and then he’s done as if nothing happened.

I’ve also got this diaper changing thing down now! I get peed on less and I’m more prepared for the projectile poops! I know the wall appreciates it. It saw its fair share of poop splatter the first time around!

Ryder has been the best little guinea pig a mom could ask for! I was way more prepared this second time around and definitely a bit more confident thanks to him. 😂💙

Mom Guilt

I had no idea what I was in for when I brought Cam home from the hospital. I knew it would be different but I didn’t realize HOW different.

The first week we brought Cam home, I cried multiple times. Not from depression or anything like that. Mainly due to feeling overwhelmed and as if I was letting Ryder down.

Ryder had been so used to having 100% of my attention all the time. When Cam came home that changed and he got maybe 30% of my attention. The rest was spent feeding Cam, changing him, etc. It was really hard on Ryder, which made it hard on me. I felt so guilty I couldn’t give either boy 100% of my attention. And it’s not easy to get a toddler to understand WHY they are no longer getting all of your attention. I had a significant amount of mom guilt.

I’ve been working hard to find ways to make more time for Ryder. While Cam naps I give Ryder my full attention. My house is completely neglected and doesn’t look like it’s clean self, but I don’t care. Ryder needs me as much as he can get during this new change.

I’ve also made Ryder my little “helper.” I ask him to help me do things for Cam. Like hand me a diaper, close the wipe warmer, put away a toy, sit with us, etc. He’s proud of himself when he’s able to help out. I can see a significant change in him from day 1 to now. He doesn’t side eye his brother anymore. Lol He actually goes over to him and looks at him. Sometimes he points at things like his foot or hand and says “what’s this?” It’s progress!

I knew it would be hard, but I guess I wasn’t prepared for how hard it would be mentally and on my heart. I was just prepared for the physical aspect. This has been an eye opening experience. However, I don’t regret a minute of it. No matter how difficult, these boys are my world. 🌎

A clean house

If you come by my house in the middle of the day, you’d think I was running a daycare with multiple kids the way Ryder can tear up a room. There are toys everywhere! Being 9 months pregnant I’m over having to bend over and pick them up every few minutes. So I just kick them to the side to clear a safe path for he and I. 🧸

However, you can darn well bet when my husband sends me a text to say he’s on his way home, I run around like a crazy person cleaning everything up so it looks like we have a sane household. 😂 He doesn’t need to see the truth in the destruction that goes on during the day. I try to spare him that stress. 🤷🏼‍♀️